what is love?
Thought I could start doing cell cultures today but seems like I'll have to wait till tomorrow cos the cells aren't ready. As a result, I'm stuck in a room with UV radiation-risk and laser hazard labels all over with nothing to do but to read scientific literature. And when I'm not reading I'm mulling over Valentine's Day and love. I mean, it's been all hyped up in the media and stuff..how not to think about it?
Every year I get slightly miffed about the way Valentine's Day is overhyped and commercialised, the same way I feel about Christmas. I mean, it makes good business sense to take advantage of people overeager to impress their partners, and I understand that, but I shall take the moral high ground and say that all the hype trivialises love. Moreover there is a certain group of people who are being done a great disservice every February 14th - singles. And Valentine's Day is, paradoxically, infinitely more effective in making members of the Lonely Hearts Club more depressed than inspiring couples to celebrate their love. I guarantee.
What then is love and why does it hurt so much to be in love sometimes. I think we have it confused with other things way too often, and that's when it hurts. Love is freedom, and does not involve need in any way. Once all these needs are generated and not fulfilled there is hurt.
That big hole inside us can only be filled by realising that we are already everything we need. What hurts is not love itself but the lies we choose to believe - lies that love of another is what makes one complete. That's not true - we are all born complete, and another person is only there to help you enjoy it.
Every year I get slightly miffed about the way Valentine's Day is overhyped and commercialised, the same way I feel about Christmas. I mean, it makes good business sense to take advantage of people overeager to impress their partners, and I understand that, but I shall take the moral high ground and say that all the hype trivialises love. Moreover there is a certain group of people who are being done a great disservice every February 14th - singles. And Valentine's Day is, paradoxically, infinitely more effective in making members of the Lonely Hearts Club more depressed than inspiring couples to celebrate their love. I guarantee.
What then is love and why does it hurt so much to be in love sometimes. I think we have it confused with other things way too often, and that's when it hurts. Love is freedom, and does not involve need in any way. Once all these needs are generated and not fulfilled there is hurt.
That big hole inside us can only be filled by realising that we are already everything we need. What hurts is not love itself but the lies we choose to believe - lies that love of another is what makes one complete. That's not true - we are all born complete, and another person is only there to help you enjoy it.
posted by kangwen at 9:27 PM
1 Comments:
Well said! I really appreciate this entry! It's true that valentine's day is over hyped, which is why some of my friends make it a point instead to celebrate V-day by doing community service, and I celebrated mine with all my other friends - single or otherwise.
I totally agree with your last sentence, that we are all made whole, and you just need somebody to appreciate it together with you. That goes for friends/family in general, sometimes we will feel lonely, but that's coz we feel that there's a gap in us that needs to be filled by other people. I took a while to figure this out, after a period of emptiness....
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